Sigh

Don't know what's happening with me this week......
I finished the triathlon on sunday but not being able to run bothers me. I often run in my dreams, long fluid steps, regular breathing, smoothely pounding the tarmac. But in the morning reality sets in, nothing fluid about my run. I desperately need to lose another 6 - 10 kg. But it's a catch two situation, I can't run well with all this extra weight and on the other hand I can't loose weight easily and running would certainly help. I'm blessed/cursed with a superefficient digestive system, every calory that enters is carefully processed and stored for lean times!

Haha, I'm in one of the pictures in the new powerbar-booklet (http://www.powerbar.com.my/). I'm in a crowd of swimmers, probably this photo was taken in A'Famosa triathlon in april. Feels like such a joke, me as an athlete, still expect someone to start pointing a finger and shout 'that one is a fake, get her out!'.

Haha. "out of the mouth of babes...". Darimi told me a few days ago: "Mama tak payah lah masuk triathlon lagi, Mama sangat slow, adik selalu kena tunggu lama!" (Mama shouldn't take part in any more triathlons, Mama is soo slow, I always have to wait for a long time for Mama to come back)..Ahem

Anyway don't really know what's bothering me this week. Didn't manage to train thanks to work and frequent rainshowers, just a few half hours cycling...
Actually I have so many things to be gratefull for. A loving husband. Four wonderfull kids, Ati has settled down well in our family, a joy to see this girl shine.
In contrary to Faie and Aini I'm not stuck in job I don't like. I got the job I've dreamed about for years and I'm really enjoying work.

So why still down??? dunno, hormones I guess

Happy memories of PD tri are tempered by the loss of Allyarham Zubir:

• This sport is not about winning the first place,
• it's not about who has the most expensive bike,
• not about who the fastest swimmer, smartest cyclist, best runner
• not about 'U dapat nombor brapa?'
• not about how young and fit you are
• it's not about your income level,
• not about a fabulous career,
• not about impressing others with your degrees and your wealth...

• This sport is about people who believe you shouldn't give up at the first obstacle,
• It's about trying to achieve your best,
• and keep tryin to achieve it, even if you fail a few times
• about puttin your aim further once you've achieved your goal
• It's about not giving up
• it's about finishing what you set out to do
• It's about young and old racing together,
• It's about the first and last finisher wishing each other luck before flag-off
• it's about cheering for the first finisher and the last,
• because we understand what both of them managed to accomplish
• It's about the comrade ship before the race, the jokes, the laughter
• About competing, but not about sore losers
• It's about feeling the strength in your arms as you pull tru the water,
• the wind in your hair while you cycle,
• it's about putting your mind over pain and exhaustion and going on
• It's about giving your children an example you believe in
• It's about community, about giving each other support, regardless of age, size,race or status
• It's about being gratefull to be alive every day.....